Gay Wedding What?

Questions you may have about our little 2-lady wedding, but might be nervous to ask. Please tell me if you have other questions!

Me: Help me with this; ask me some questions.
Fancee: What time is the wedding?
M: Gay-specific wedding questions!
F: What time is the gay wedding?

getting married in days

Who were your vendors?  Did you love them?

Caterer: Cuisine Chez Vous

Yes, we loved our caterer. Every meeting we had with them was amazing, they really worked with us within our budget, and seemed really excited that we were getting married and having this awesome party. They accommodated our perhaps strange requests (“we have the pies, but can you heat them up and make them look pretty?), and were just fantastic every step of the way.

Flowers: Melissa’s Flower Farm

Yes, we loved Melissa and our flowers! I wrote a post on it here. Melissa was fantastic to work with, we got a million compliments on the flowers, and she also worked in our budget. I can’t say enough good things about her. If you’re not sure who to talk to: talk to her.

Music: Nor’Easter

You may sense a theme here: we loved our band. They found the caller we worked with. We sent them some music we liked and they just went for it. We loved all of the music they played, we had a ton of people dancing, and they clearly enjoyed being at our wedding (major points for them!). I would probably hang out with them in real life. And the music was beautiful. My mother has run into them in the Contra Dance circuit since our wedding, and they even remember us! They were awesome, go book them.

Awesome band, willing to play even if it's just the brides dancing.

Venue: Kaleva Lodge at Fort Pond

Our venue was perfect for what we were looking for. The space was beautiful, the booking process was simple, and the price was very reasonable (read: well under $1k). They arranged to have someone clean up after us for a small extra fee, and we didn’t have to worry about a thing. Their kitchen accommodates catering staff and they offered us the use of tables and chairs. They were a wonderful find.

Dress (Turtle’s): J. Crew

You know, J. Crew, it was great, blah blah blah. Turtle’s dress looked amazing on her. It was really easy to order the dresses and return the ones that didn’t fit. We had it altered somewhere local for very reasonable prices. I preferred the dress process at home to the in-store shebang.

Dress (Bird’s): David’s Bridal

What, you’re surprised I’m not linking to David’s Bridal? Please don’t buy from them. While dress prices may seem reasonable, they’re also reasonable from other sources, and David’s will rip you off with alterations. Plus, who wants to buy a DRESS from somewhere named after a man? What does David know about dresses? We were asked which of us was the bride, our alterations were messed up a couple of times, and I left wishing I’d skipped the whole dress thing.

Suit (Bird’s): A.J. Machete & Sons

LOVED my suit, loved working with A.J. and Lianna. The customer service was stellar, I loved how the suit came out, and it blew my mind how awesome it could all be done over email. Amazing.

Jewelry: Turtle’s from an antique shop, Bird’s from Fairbank and Perry

We loved them. LOVED them. I think we went into the shop about five times before we decided to buy anything, and they remembered us every time. When I picked up our engraved rings, Geraldine gave me a hug; I was sad that we wouldn’t have a reason to visit anymore! Since then, we’ve visited their new location, they still remember us, and we all hugged hello. Even if these aren’t the people at your wedding, these are the people you want to be a part of your wedding.

Photographers: Ellie Leonardsmith and Alison Abreu-Garcia

These are two really amazing people who take really amazing pictures and you want them both at your wedding. Because they were too busy being on the picture-taking side of the camera, I don’t have many pictures of them, but here’s what I do have (Ellie the Excellent is the tallest one in the blue dress, and Alison the Awesome is on the right with the snazzy glasses. That’s right, not only are they really fantastic photographers, they are also both incredibly attractive):

College friends! Including our awesome photographers!


Who proposed?

We both did!  We had talked about getting married for a little while, and Turtle had even bought my ring, though I had no idea where it was.  The day we found and I bought her ring, we decided, “Why wait for some arbitrary day in the future?” and I asked her that afternoon.  She said yes and wore her ring – and that night, she asked me!

Who got a ring?

See above question: we both did, and we both picked out our own ring on two great antiquing adventures.

Are you both wearing dresses?

We both wore dresses for the ceremony, but I changed into a suit (pants & vest) for the reception.  So comfortable!  It was the best of both worlds.

Which one of you is the man?

Um, last we checked, neither of us was a man, and neither of us plans to become a man.  We are both “the woman” – hence the “2 lady wedding.”

Who planned the wedding?

Surprise – we both did. Notice a theme? I did a lot more poking around, visiting other wedding blogs and coming up with lists of ideas.  I was also the one to say, “Let’s do X-wedding-related-activity today!” That said, Turtle was the one who found our venue after 5 minutes of searching – she didn’t do much poking around, but once she did, she found what we were looking for!

It’s legal for you to get married in other states, like New Hampshire. Is there a reason you’re getting married in MA?

Massachusetts has been our home for our entire relationship, and is the first state to legalize gay marriage.  It feels important to us to support this state that first made it possible for us to get married.


3 responses to “Gay Wedding What?

  1. Pingback: Basic facts and information « Roughing It

  2. Teri

    Do people really ask ‘which one is the man’? Wow. Just wow. It’s so ignorant it’s almost comical.

    • When I was dating a girl it was ‘the question’. There was always the ‘how long have you been together’ and normal things everyone asks a straight couple and then that one.

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