Make Love Stay

Someone I met at CTY (which stands for “Can’t Tell You,” duh) a million years ago writes a beautiful blog, and this jumped out at me today:

“When two people meet and fall in love, there’s a rush of magic. Magic is just naturally present then. We tend to feed on that gratuitous magic without striving to make any more. One day we wake up and find that the magic is gone. We hustle to get it back, but by then it’s usually too late, we’ve used it up. What we have to do is work like hell at making additional magic right from the start. It’s hard work, especially when it seems superfluous or redundant, but if we can remember to do it, we greatly improve our chances of making love stay.”

-from Still Life with Woodpecker, by Tom Robbins*

At our meeting with our minister last weekend, she said, “There will be times when you don’t like each other.  Love is not enough to make a marriage work.  What you need is trust and respect.  That is the core of the marriage.”

I am hanging on hard to these ideas.  Do the work.  Keep the respect, earn the trust, give the trust, hang on tight, make it stay.

*The only book I’ve read by Tom Robbins is Even Cowgirls Get the Blues, and it pretty much changed my life.  I will read this one shortly. You should too, and then we can talk about it, and it will be fun.


Filed under Marriage/Wedding/Engagement, Relationships

4 responses to “Make Love Stay

  1. Dude, my brother went to CTY for four years. We called it Genius Camp.

  2. No, but actually… that is one of those sobering but also motivating pieces of knowledge. Hang in there.

  3. hey, i just found your blog today while messing around on facebook–it’s so thoughtful and sweet and a delight to read! thanks for linking to mine; i’m glad you enjoy it! i’m going to add yours to my links, too. a million congratulations to you and your fiancee.

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